Normally when I see the jesus guy with the megaphone around downtown LA; I chuckle. A lot of my friends really hate him and denounce his presence. I personally think there is worse things he could be doing rather then yelling about jesus christo. He could be mugging you, selling sex slaves or mixing up meth in his bathtube but NO; he is yelling about jesus. I’ll take that over any of those other passtimes he could be doing.
There is a church in my neighborhood too…they don’t bother me either. I really don’t mind people singing about jesus and praying to him and speaking in tongues. However, not everyone agrees with my sediments. For some weird reason; people are OFFENDED by the church going folks….WTF? HELLO, you live in the hood where gangs shoot each other and crack-dealers break into your cars and the JESUS PEOPLE BOTHER YOU?
Let me explain…we have these neighborhood watch meetings whereupon the cops come and take complaints about the hood and try to beautify the hood. The only cleaning up I see are the homeless guys peeing on car tires and sidewalks and for some reason; I don’t feel that counts but I digress…
So I stop by the meeting solely because I heard rumors of FOOD being served…catered in fact by a restaurant nearby that I can’t afford to eat at…(always an alterior motive). I stroll by nonchalantly, my eagle eye on the look out for my beloved food (I hadn’t eaten in a while…). Okay, I’m annoyed…the food is gone or nowhere in sight but there is cookies so that is enough to satisfy my palette for a second or two.
But the real reason I stuck around was one of the cute guys in my neighborhood was there. I figure the only time I see this dude is in passing so I figure a public gathering is the perfect time to show off my wily wit and unabashed charm. And it didn’t hurt that I had my incredibally cute dog with me…
The cops mention about the recent gang shooting about how drugs were involved and blah blah…people were shot dead…etc…yeah yeah, then they start talking about how the gangs extort money from the businesses…yeah yeah…we know. How they are trying to stop it…sure sure…you bet. Then they mention the gang injection which I was kind of interested in because LA is gang central and it’s good to know which gangs arn’t allowed in your neighborhood.
So they tell me which gangs arn’t allowed in and if they get caught they are in a lot of trouble…these were injunctions that were just passed so I felt it was kind of good.
Now they ask if anyone else has anymore things they wanted to add and this annoying frumpy white dude who is always trolling around the neighborhood (he thinks he’s a hipster but he is SOOOOO not…he’s like a hipster wanna be reject frumpy kid from Utah)…he says; “I have a complaint I’d like to lodge against the church”….”they are disturbing the peace with their loud singing two days a week”…”I can’t sleep at night”…(imagine this frumpy dumpy looking slouchy quasi-moto white guy saying this in a whiny emo kid voice to get the full effect).
First of all; let me go on the record and say this is the first time I’m going to defend jesus people but I feel it’s justifible. I then cannot hold my tongue becasue I realize I live in a building of assholes…six or seven people AGREED with him. The church people really bugged them and they wanted it to be a priority to shut them up.
At this point; I had to say something. I reply with; “People singing to jesus and praying are more upsetting to you then the gang members shooting people a block away?” Are you kidding me that you are worried about people singing the Lord’s praises over the crack-dealer shooting people outside your window and breaking into your car and if your lucky like me; stealing your car???? REallY? fucking really?
First of all; they HAVE to fucking pray…they LIVE in this neighborhood…they are praying feverishly to get the fuck out. Secondly of all; people celebrating their faith is one of the only positive things that happens in this neighborhood and you want to put a fucking damper on it??? Secondly, they worship their savior two days a week for a few hours…are you really telling me that is ruining your life and sleep pattern? Especially when they are generally done by 8pm. WTF??
I’m not a jesus freak or anything but of all the negative, crime-laden things that go down in this hood…you are going to go after the jesus people?
The cops starting laughing and readily agreed with me about people praying to be saved from this hood is certainly not a criminal activity…Leave them the fuck alone. Let them pray…they are not shooting people or hooking or peeing on our front lawn. They are okay peeps.
Only and I repeat ONLY in downtown Los Diablos will you find people who are blaise about the gang shootings but throughly and completely distraught and genuinely upset over people praising jesus.
Now if the jesus people go David Kerish ala Church of the Nazarene on us…then let’s start rethinking our priorities but in the meantime…let them place their hope somewhere cuz it sure doesn’t lie in the LAPD or any of the patrons of this fine neighborhood.
