If you know me; which you don’t. I have the most unreasonable problems with transportation via the automobile variety. Either it gets stolen, breaks down every week or some weird random thing obstructs my immediate transportation needs. Hence, that is the case once again.
Let me preface with; I have been broken down on the side of the road in the last year more times than I EVER have in my entire life. I blame this ghetto dealership that my former place of employment (one of the many reasons it’s former) hooked me up with…total rip off artists, selling bunk ass cars and just generally jacking people. Whatever…I’m over it.
Last straw. Yeah, I’m not springing for a new engine…that is out of the question so my broken down jetta sits in a parking garage in downtown LA; perhaps forever…like many cars in there.
I am back on the public transit which I realize after the last week or so; I missed. Not really missed but more or less missed the beserk amount of character building it does! I hate the public transit; I hate standing next to gross mofos (germophoic talking)…I hate nasty gang bangers stalking me and mostly importantly of all; I hate waiting for the bus/subway/taxi who are all on their own demented timetables.
The things I did miss (unbenounced to me until earlier today) was the eccentric characters on the public transit and the fights that break out OFTEN. I’m downtown trolling around, running errands and the like…I get on my second transfer and there is a Cyndi Lauper reject wanna be on the bus; great!! I love fodder.
She is yelling at people and trying to solicit (sex?) or something with the gentlement on the bus. (I’d love to know if there were any takers after she got kicked off…it would be interesting to see what kind of people pay good hard-earned money for some Hep-C and Gonnarhea and the herpes) She is standing in the middle of the aisle with her big 80’s New Jersey Bridge and Tunneler trash hair, her combat boots, fluffy skirt and polka dot shirt with an over-sized belt…yapping away and not moving for the old people to pass.
If there is one thing you must, absolutely MUST be courteous of on the public transit is the old people. I’ve seen gang bangers fuck up people for being mean to old people or just plain not being courteous and givinn them your chair and shit. But not this chick…she actually pushed a little old lady into me…
The bus driver yelled at her; ‘bitch, get to the back of the bus”…the “bitch” aka Cyndi Lauper reject then starts in on a mirage of insults about race, religion, her occupation (duh, she is the reason you are getting around you idiota)….the insult hurling continues for some time…
At this point, the young kind of pretty black lady who was driving the bus yells; “yo momma a bitch ass hoe just like you” “get off my bus bitch”…The bitch didn’t like that and she sat and yelled and yelled about being disabled (do disabled people wear five inch stiletto boots? I would imagine that to hamper your disability?) So they went at it for some time; and the rest of the riders and myself were laughing but trying to hide it.
Eventually the bus driver says; “get off my bus before I kick yo crack ass mother fucker…and yo grandmommy a bitch too…hoe!’
Man, I love it when bus drivers go ghetto gangster on people…I think i would become a bus driver just to do that.
Usually after an altercation (which is almost every time you ride…at least on the east side….there is a specific public transit demographic shift at vermont and Wilshire…from dirty gangsters to clean west siders but that is for another blog)…I think everyone should be forced to ride the public transit on the east side…downtown LA and East LA…you can’t say you are “tough” or “hard-core” if you haven’t been carless in east LA and had a few knives pulled on you…I digress…
So after altercations; there is an uncomfortable silence that takes place among the patrons…some want to laugh, some feel bad and want to comfort the bus driver and still others were trying to cut a deal with the Cyndy Lauper reject and now they arn’t sure whether or not to follow their business propositions or wait for the next trollip to show up; maybe they’ll cut a better deal and not be so boisterous.
